Building Positive Relationships with Your Child’s School

At I AM, we regularly hear from parents who find it difficult to communicate and collaborate with their child’s school. This can feel overwhelming, but there are steps you can take to build a positive and effective working relationship.

Working Together with Schools

Working together is not always easy. Emotions often run high, especially if you feel your child is not being supported. Remember that schools face funding pressures, and many teachers have little training or experience with autism. A calm, prepared approach can help you achieve better outcomes for your child.

Preparing for Conversations with School Staff

If you have concerns, it’s important to raise them directly with the school. Instead of catching teachers for a quick chat at the school gate, arrange a proper meeting where everyone has time to focus on the issues. Treat these interactions like a business meeting: be clear, calm, and assertive.

Here are practical steps you can take:

1. Make an Appointment

Arrange a meeting with key people – such as the Headteacher, SENCO, class teacher, and teaching assistant. If possible, include the governor responsible for SEND. This ensures your concerns are heard by the right people.

2. Allow Enough Time

Request at least an hour for the meeting. This allows enough time for a full and constructive discussion.

3. Create an Agenda

Prepare a clear agenda and share it with everyone in advance. Note down your key points and gather specific examples. Sharing this early helps staff prepare and makes the meeting more effective.

4. Bring Support

Invite a trusted friend or relative to join you. They can take notes and offer emotional support if the meeting feels stressful.

5. Take Notes

Keep written records of what is discussed. This ensures you have evidence if you need to escalate concerns later.

6. Agree on Action Points

Before ending the meeting, confirm what actions will be taken, who is responsible, and the timescales for completion.

7. Schedule a Follow-Up

Set a date for a review meeting to check progress. Ongoing dialogue helps ensure that agreed actions are followed through.

8. Share Meeting Notes

Send a copy of the notes and agreed action points to all attendees. This acts as a reminder and keeps everyone accountable.

9. Confirm Review Date

Never forget they are your child, you are their parent, you know your child better than anyone.

10. Remember Your Role

You know your child better than anyone. Stay confident in your knowledge and perspective, and remember that you are your child’s strongest advocate.

How I AM Can Support You

At I AM, we provide one-to-one support for autistic children aged 10 and over. This can help with:

  • Building independence, such as travelling to school.

  • Developing coping strategies for the school environment.

  • Supporting transitions between school years or schools.

  • Providing short-term support packages as part of a “Team Around the Child” (TAC).

We also run Youth Groups led by our experienced Key Workers. These groups give autistic young people safe spaces to build friendships, practice social skills, and enjoy shared activities.

Additional Resources 

External resources:

For information about the support we offer contact ADMIN@I-AM-AUTISM.ORG.UK or call 0161 866 8483
Share this